SOD would like to cordially welcome you to yet another installment of BOM.

We define BITCH OF THE MONTH as anyone, irritating enough to warrant a rant of Homeric proportions: male, female, or whatever.

This month's bitch is the one channel that promises music to the masses, but fails to broadcast the one thing that made them great. That's right, MTV, a.k.a. Music Television. In its inception, MTV was a channel for MUSIC. MTV was there when teenage angst made hormones the size of New York burroughs. MTV at one time filled the youth with hopes of becoming the next Sex Pistol, David Bowie, Stiv Bator,or Alien Sex God.

Now all MTV provides is an endless stream of spoiled teenagers in Hawaii, or lame excuses to feature Carson Daily's bad taste in brown clothing. If the idea of watching a bunch of fame seeking twenty somethings bitch about how tough life is while laying around the nicest condos in San Francisco is your idea of compelling television, SOD suggests you leave your house immediately and go forth on a journey for your very own Real World.

In fact, the Sisteurs truly hope that someday it will be revealed that Puck ended up in a Russian gulag shovelling salt and eating yogurt on a 15 year "anti-dickhead" sentence. And while SOD is at it, it is the Sistuers wish that the Winngebago used in Road Rules be blown up by someone with real demolition expertise, like Johnny Rotten.

SOD is filled with regret to report that the channel that introduced us to music videos has forgotten what the fucking "M" stands for. Pop has indeed eaten itself. Video has finally killed the radio star. It is indeed a sad day when one has to watch VH-1 if videos are what one is after. Total Request Live and endless hours of that Canadian twat Tom Greene do not a goddamn MTV make.

And how about a Deathmatch between MTV and Much Music??? Much Music would win. Why you may ask? Because Much Music does just that, PLAYS MUCH MUSIC!!!

Martha Quinn where are you when SOD needs you??? At this point, the Sistuers would even settle for a weekend video marathon hosted by J.J. Jackson and Cyndi Lauper! It is indeed a sad day when hoping for a Cyndi Lauper marathon is something one actually finds to be better than the alternative.

In the words of the Dead Kennedys: "MTV GET OFF THE AIR!"

If you would like to nominate a BOM, please e-mail SOD at sod@sisteurs.zzn.com. If we hate them enough, we'll rip them a new orifice for you.